Woke up this morning at around 4am absolutely exhausted. I woke myself up from a dream. It was a very, very vigorous dream. In my dream I was at war. I was having this rather intense argument with some faceless people. I knew that I knew them, I recognized that much - but they had no faces - so I couldn't be sure.
In my dream I was so frustrated.I remember having these pleading arguments (shouting matches really) with the faceless ones. They would not back me up on something really important - I was accused of wrong and they knew I was innocent but they just looked at me and repeated they knew nothing of my innocence. They were not accusing - just refusing to clear my name. I ran from faceless face to faceless face - jolted in the pain of their rejection.
I woke and tried to analyse the dream (I am a little bit of an over analyzer).
Knowing I had to get up to go to work in two hours I surrendered again to sleep.
The dream (which was now becoming desperate) continued. The rejectors remained faceless. My determination to find at least one person who believed in my innocence grew into sobbing pleads.
I felt betrayed.
The alarm went off.
I knew what the dream was telling me - it is time to put a full stop to the hurt and sense of betrayal I have been feeling concerning my work situation last year.
The betrayal was costly. It cost me financially. Worse - it cost me emotionally and spiritually.
So, without fully understanding yet how I am going to get that full stop next to the hurt - and keep it there - I know I must.
I'm hanging on tight to the better things.
2 comments:
You are working through things so you can let go and that is never easy. But it will be SO worth it in the end!
Hey - 6.5kgs. 14.3lbs. I am a star!
Wow! I hate dreams like that where no one will listen, and you're just so frustrated. I usually wake from those grumpy. Hope it didn't ruin your day. :0)
But glad you got the message.
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