I'm a proud mum

My son (David) went to see the director of the SA film Company the other day. He had emailed them a script for a short film that he had written and the bloke wanted to have a chat. David came home with a firm commitment from the company that they were really excited with his script and that they were going to fund him so he can turn his script into a film.

How proud am I? Pretty proud.

So now he is hiring the crew (some of which he worked with when he was at film school two years ago). I'll keep you posted when it is released.

I'm going to be a famous mum - I mean a mum of a famous person ;).

This is my son - he's pretty excited..

Well done son.

I had a dream

Woke up this morning at around 4am absolutely exhausted. I woke myself up from a dream. It was a very, very vigorous dream. In my dream I was at war. I was having this rather intense argument with some faceless people. I knew that I knew them, I recognized that much - but they had no faces - so I couldn't be sure.

In my dream I was so frustrated.I remember having these pleading arguments (shouting matches really) with the faceless ones. They would not back me up on something really important - I was accused of wrong and they knew I was innocent but they just looked at me and repeated they knew nothing of my innocence. They were not accusing - just refusing to clear my name. I ran from faceless face to faceless face - jolted in the pain of their rejection.

I woke and tried to analyse the dream (I am a little bit of an over analyzer).

Knowing I had to get up to go to work in two hours I surrendered again to sleep.

The dream (which was now becoming desperate) continued. The rejectors remained faceless. My determination to find at least one person who believed in my innocence grew into sobbing pleads.

I felt betrayed.

The alarm went off.

I knew what the dream was telling me - it is time to put a full stop to the hurt and sense of betrayal I have been feeling concerning my work situation last year.

The betrayal was costly. It cost me financially. Worse - it cost me emotionally and spiritually.

So, without fully understanding yet how I am going to get that full stop next to the hurt - and keep it there - I know I must.

I'm hanging on tight to the better things.

Reflecting on better things

These photos were taken from our local jetty.

As I looked at them today (part of holding onto better things) I remembered the amazing, overwhelming realization that God's presence is truly visible for those who see. I remembered the peace I felt. I remembered the promise I made that I would rejoice in His greatness. I remembered His promise to sustain my belief even through the dark days - You won't always get the sunsets.

I am making a list of the things I need to let go of - Where the full stops belong! It's time.

"Sometimes holding on makes you stronger. sometimes it's letting go."

A renewed determination

First of all I really want to say thanks to a fellow blogger for letting me have a bit of a rant and rave on saturday night. I was feeling a little bit low (putting it mildly) and a whole lot sorry for myself. During our conversation I was (gently - but firmly) reminded that perhaps I needed to let go of a few things and to get a firmer hold on some different things. I really value everything that was said. I was encouraged.

I tried to pray. The tears where often distracting yet somehow necessary. I reflected. I opened my heart a little more.

I slept.

Morning came and with it a renewed determination to get on with it.

Some of the things I want to grab hold of a whole lot more and to find a way to express on a daily basis appreciation. Appreciation for the good things in my life, for opportunities yet to come, for grace offered freely from the one who paid the greatest price, for eyes that allow me to see - really see - His creation, for the invitation to commune with our creator in a personal way, for forgiveness and for still having a pulse.

There are a few things in my life (experiences, disappointments, mistakes, hurts, fears) that I need to put a full stop next to. These things I need to bring before God and allow His guidance and His peace to direct me. I need to forgive some people. I need to seek forgiveness. I need to be forgiven. I need to trust. I need to trust His forgiveness.

Trusting is believing that God will keep His word
And trusting is believing you're every prayer is heard
And trusting is letting God know you're depending on Him
It's feeling His forgiveness within.

Trusting is believing that God cares for you
And trusting is believing just as a child would do
It's like giving your hand to Jesus knowing He wont let go

I'll trust Him because He loves me so.


So that was my prayer today.

Thanks Linds.

One more whine

Complimenting yesterdays post (where I had a few whines about the upcoming weather) is today's update.

The really nice weather lady punctuated these words concerning tomorrows forecast:

EXTREME POLLEN COUNT

DUST STORMS JUST ABOUT EVERYWHERE

AN UNCOMFORTABLE 37 DEGREES

TAKE CARE (her exact words).

No kidding.....

If you had my sinuses you would be feeling my pain right now.

weather forecast

It would be fair to say that I do not particularly like hot weather, especially, unseasonal hot weather like summer-hot weather- when it is still spring. That's gripe number one!

Gripe number two: I really, really don't like these all consuming, dry, (make that very dry) northerly winds we are so blessed with over here in South Australia. 'How bad', you ask? They have the capacity to dehydrate your skin to a shrivelly, pruney, sandpapery (I know these are not real words - but they are expressive - so they stay!) kind of look - not to mention what it does to the sinuses - or my mood!!!

So, here's the weather forecast for the next week

Saturday      Windy. Late afternoon change.      Max 37
Sunday        Morning shower, then fine.         Max 25
Monday        Fine. Mostly sunny.                Max 25
Tuesday       windy. Hot and dry.                Max 35
Wednesday     Hot and dry.                       Max 36

I was doing just fine until I heard the lovely weather girl announce the GREAT news. Did she have to have that smile plastered on her face?

The mere thought has set my sinuses tingling.

Did I mention that IT IS NOT SUMMER YET?

At least Sunday and Monday look like nice days

I know, I know

In everything give thanks...

It's going to be a tough week.

My favourite first born had a birthday

On Thursday (16th) it was my eldest daughters birthday. My favorite first born child is now twenty three. Twenty three! Where, oh where have those years gone?

It seems only fitting that I take this opportunity of introducing my eldest girl with a few baby tales.

Full name is Ellisha (no middle name) - a bug bear of hers that comes up frequently and usually in a whinny, 'how come I have no middle name?' sort of grilling! My middle name is Ann but I have never been called Ann, nor referred to as Ann. So that's that and let's just drop it shall we my dear.

Ellisha was a honeymoon baby (thought you might want to know this fact- mmm). Ellisha's pregnancy was very difficult (a thesis in itself). She eventually came into the world via an emergency cesarean. When I woke from the anesthetic I thought the nurse said I had lost her. She said, "you had a beautiful baby girl!", my foggy brain registered that to be past tense.

She was beautiful (and still is) and very much alive. I know a lot of mothers try and suggest their baby smiled really, really early, but Ellisha really, really did. Day two she blessed us with a huge smile (even the cleaner said that it was genuine and not wind).

What a dream baby - well almost. She was, in fact, a finicky little feeder. Took about 1 hour of swapping from nipple to nipple before she would settle for a good feed. Perhaps the fact that I remained excruciatingly engorged (so much so that during feeding everyone else had to clear the room because the milk from unused breast was missile- like.) No kidding! Oh yes, and when she fed her legs were out stiff. Here's a photo to prove it.

She was a fantastic sleeper - sleeping right through the night from 9 weeks. No colic. No grizzles.

What's more no 'terrible two' tantrums (totally forbidden). If it looked like she was about to throw a wobbly I would scoop her up, distract her and suggest that she try another way of expressing her frustrations. She was a rather obliging toddler.

As a young tacker she did have this scary relational thing going on with complete strangers that we happened to bump into when out at the shops. She would approach them, tap them on the leg and say, "I love you!".

Yep, she was really embracing the 'Jesus loves you' concept- with passion ;)

As for the walking. That's a story worth sharing. It goes like this:
By her first birthday I suspected she was just about ready to take her first independent steps - all the signs were there. It came to her birthday and we had a little party. No matter what coaxing methods I used to entice the girl to walk ( my un-cooperative and stubborn first born) refused to entertain the guests. She would stand, stare, then smugly plonk herself on the ground (I stand by the smug look). Anyhow, eventually the guests left and still darling daughter had not fulfilled my expectation for her to be walking by her first birthday. Hubby went out and Ellisha and I were all alone at home. About half an hour after the last person left I was sitting on the lounge having a well earned cup of tea when little Miss stubborn pulled herself up and ran out of the lounge, down the corridor and back into the lounge via the kitchen doors. She was giggling as she did it. I am not making this up. She did not tentatively wobble, nor did she hold onto anything - she ran.

When she came back into the lounge (to be greeted by a wide eyed, open mouthed mother) she raised her hands into the air, laughed, and then plonked herself back onto the floor. Of course I frantically dialed all the numbers in my directory just to be greeted with disbelief. Fortunately (for her) she backed the performance up the next day with a solid little gallop around the lounge - and basically hasn't looked back since. To her credit she got into the finals for the Australian under 13 National Athletics Championships (100 m hurdles and high jump). She still holds the State record for Little Atletics under 17's in the 200m hurdles and high jump. She is a terrific netballer and not bad at basketball. However, please don't make me talk about her swimming achievements - or for that matter, even her style - pretty pathetic - which is sad seeing as I can't run or jump but boy can I swim!

So my favourite first born is now twenty three.

I brought her up proper (honest;)).
Oh well, I guess she is her mother's daughter!!!

Sorry mum!

Happy Birthday my favourite first born.

Oh Yeah!

I'M SO EXCITED (YEAH, YEAH)

I JUST CAN'T HIDE IT (YEAH, YEAH)

I'M ABOUT TO LOOSE CONTROL

AND I THINK I ...

HOLD ON!

EXCUSE ME!!

COME ON GUYS

I SAID - I AM SO EXCITED!!!!!!

I NEED A BIT OF VOCAL BACKING SUPPORT HERE (A little jig wouldn't go amiss either;))

HERE GOES

ON THE COUNT OF THREE

ONE ...

TWO ...

THREE .

I'M SO EXCITED (YEAH, YEAH)

I JUST CAN'T HIDE IT (YEAH, YEAH)

I'M ABOUT TO LOOSE CONTROL

AND I THINK I LIKE IT

LIKE IT.

WELL DONE (clap, clap, clap).

WHAT ARE YOU SO EXCITED ABOUT? I HEAR YOU ALL CHORUS (tunefully).

drum rolllllllllllllllllllllllllll

1300grams

you heard right

1300 grams slimmer.

The bag challenge

Julie from my life as Julie mom has been brave enough to empty her bag and declare its contents. Granted it was a little bit eclectic ( that's actually a bit of an understatement) however, I thought her justification was admiral. Any old how, Julie has invited fellow bloggers to reveal their bags (and contents). I thought I was in with a chance (a little competitive - have you noticed?), however, however, on reviewing my photos I must say I am a little bit disappointed with my effort, (Please don't challenge my atrocious grammar on the however s - TA), (and while we are talking of language skills, I would appreciate it if you ignore all spelling, punctuation or dribble mistakes, double Ta).

So, here is my bag
I know, I know it's pretty funky. I got this bag in Sydney (notice the bridge and the opera house?) when I went to see Billy Elliot The Musical (boy that was some show!). Now, I may have to go back to Julie's blog, but I am fairly sure mine might be a little teeny weeny bit larger.

Now for the contents


we have:
1. A plastic shopping bag filled with chocolate bars - yes I know I am on a weight loss thingy me bobby - which are to be placed in the student's reward chest - yes I know that we are not meant to reward students with sweets. "She's a rebel in disguise! Oh yes she is, a rebel in disguise!!".
2. A lanyard with my classroom keys attached - a must for everyone.
3. A little plastic container where I store my Ipod shuffle ( a birthday pressie - loaded with Mama Mia the musical songs).
4. A pump water bottle with a third of water within.
5. A full can of chilled Pepsi Max for lunch - please don't lecture me about the benefits of poison - Ta.
6. A little shoulder bag from Thailand that holds my various cards - please notice the honour card in the pouch (five coffes = 1 free) and please note how easily accessible it is ;)
7. My change purse -the red thing - unzipped - to indicate lack of change at the moment.
8. Packet of codeine and paracetemol - I have had this really hacky cough - honest.
9. A strip of anti acid tablets - yep - they are for my heartburn caused by Pepsi Max?
10. You can just see the edge of my nasal spray - hay fever.
11. An almost empty bag of no brand licorice - to counteract the effects from the codeine - if you get my drift?
12. My central locking car keys - for the car, of course!
13. My flight pouch that now holds my tax return cheque - I am really into recycling ;)
14. One of those USB things - everyone carries that around with them.
15. A cloth to clean my spectacles - which is a bit of a laugh cause it is filthy.
16. A pen that does not work - and I have discovered this fact at least five times now.
17. A petrol discount docket - no further explanation needed - accept to say - they are usually on my fridge when I drive to the petrol station - go figure!
18 A nutritiously balanced lunch in the form of a plastic cheese (low fat) sandwich - on white bread - nicely presented in some glad wrap a fantastic haven for all sorts of bacteria.

It was as I was arranging my contents (at school) that I realised there was something missing.

I left my mobile phone at home. Good news is that I now know I can live without it.

So, that's my bag and all it's contents.

What does your bag look like - let Julie know and we will all come and judge you - nah not really. Julie wins - hands down (Christmas stuff???)

And the inspirational quote for this post is

If you light a lamp for somebody, it will also brighten your path
Buddhist saying

cheers.

A little more Sydney

Here are a few more photos from my trip to Sydney. They are not in order, nor are they formatted very well. Thing i, you see I got a little carried away when I was uploading the photos - by the time I came up for air they were all parked on the page and I can not for the love of me (at least without shouting some obscenities - which I am trying to curb - seeing as I never swore for 23 years( ( sorry for the pathetic punctuation!)

Any old how - I will give a little commentary on the photos as I go.
















This is The Three Sisters up at the Blue Mountains (about a 2 hour train ride from Sydney). Beautiful place. I mean really beautiful - definitely part of God's wonderful creation.















What you need to understand is that my favourite chocolate of all time is Lindt milk chocolate balls -(served at exactly 22C). So, how very excited were we to stumble on a Lindt Cafe.
Oh me, Oh my this white chocolate drink was - to die for!















He was looking at me in a kind of funky way. I am fairly sure he was trying to communicate with me. I am imagining something like - 'Heh babe, looking good ;)", or something similar maybe?

(Okay so I forgot what I was going to say on that photo - or why I even posted it.. still, it stays...)














Our beautiful Opera house - did you know it was short listed to go on the modern 'wonders of the world' list? It's true! And it's no wonder (well it is a wonder).











Sydney Harbour bridge. Jenna and I walked over it. Check out the sky - neat heh?

Well this has been a mammoth effort bringing these photos to you. I deleted about six because I just could not format them (and I confess to swearing twice).

And so, I leave you with the inspirational quote for this post

"Know how to give without hesitation, how to lose without regret, how to acquire without meaness".
(George Sand)

Feeling a bit poorly

Hi guys

I have so much to blog about - honest. Thing is I feel awful (physically).

Here are my woes:

All the walking and climbing in Sydney aggravated my knee injury - I have been in agony and have had to pull up every 100 steps for a rest. I told the doctor about it and he said he would send me back to the hospital for a review. "Does this mean I go back on a waiting list?", I asked. "Yep", was his reply. Great - the waiting list is like two years. I have already done that and unfortunately when I rocked up to the hospital (the first time) it was on a day when the knee was functioning pretty well (comparatively) and the doctors guide was whether or not I could climb 6 steps. It mattered not if it hurt or that you became completely bed ridden after 8 steps???? Off the list I went!

I have been fighting this horrible virus which is rampant in Adelaide. I am up to my third round. Feel awful (whooping like cough, aches, headaches, tiredness, congested head). Lasts about 8 days then you feel ok for about a week then it is back - so, I figure I should be feeling a little better in time for school to go back (2 days time) - lucky me heh?


On a different note -

GOOD NEWS or BAD NEWS depending on how you look at it.

I have lost 400grams in four days. Now that's not a lot I know (especially when the damage is as bad as I have let it get). So you could say - bad news. However, I got the calculator out and worked out that I have been averaging a 400g gain per week. So, really it is great news cause it took 7 days to put on 400g and only 4 days to get it off. That's GREAT news. Especially if you look at it as a 400g loss and a prevention of a 400gram gain for this week. Thats 800grams - let's dance.

Actually if you could hold off on the dancing until my head clears and my knees is a little less inflamed that would be great.

Dancing on the inside - maybe!

Sydney trip - a little perving

Day four was a very warm one (35c). Jenna and I decided it was the perfect day to catch the ferry to Manley - a beach well known for its surf and 'surfers'.

Now I am not trying to suggest that either one of us are surfers but it would be fair to say that we were excited about the prospect of checking out the possibility of perhaps 'giving it a go'.

The ferry ride was very nice. There were lots of tourists with their boards and their thongs (flip flops) and bikinis (I will confess to being tempted to throw a few of the '10' bodies overboard). As we enjoyed the ride we were beginning to sense the possibility that we would be caught up in all the 'beachy' atmosphere and , who knows, give surfin a go!

So, we arrive at the beach and it is swarming with fellow beach lovers.

First up we find the surfboards that they have for hire

The next thing to check out was the actual surf

Not bad!

Not bad at all!!!

Hold on - aren't those rocks a little dangerous?

'

I had better check out the notice

Strong current -Mmmm perhaps I should re-think this surfing idea?

I think this is as far into the surf I am going to get.

Perhaps a little game of beach volleyball instead?

I am so not perving!!!

Ok, maybe a little!

I wasn't that obvious -was I?

Definitely worth a second look - don't you think?

He was so posing!

No surfing - but all in all a very nice day.

Cheers

The good news first

Before I commence my blog on my recent trip to Sydney may I take this opportunity of getting real? I mean really real!

There is good news (relatively speaking) and shocking news (the truth).

So, today I did what I have been putting off for forever and slid onto the weighing scales.

The good news (remember I said it was relative) is that I am not quite as heavy as I thought I may have been.

The shocking news is that I am only 3 kilos off my heaviest weight ever.

Okay, so I reckon if I am going to really, really, really do something about this disaster then I had better get really, really, really real and disclose all. I need to become a little vulnerable and a whole lot more accountable.

Man, my weight is out of control.

I have got to do something - for pity sake I am on hypertension medication after all.

Wake up Mary!!!!!

Friends - I repeat, FRIENDS

I weigh (taking a deep breath)

84.8 kg - that is almost 13 and a half stone.

18 months ago I weighed 87 kg, then I lost 18 kgs and was 70 kg last christmas. Although that was heavier than I should be (my ideal weight is 55kg) I was sitting ok with the weight.

So, I have set myself a goal.

I will not put up with this attitude of mine one more day.

I plan to be 70 kg again by this christmas.

Watch this space.....

just to make sure that I keep in my minds eye how much work I have to do I am going to add a photo of my current self taken in Sydeny but two days ago.

(any minute now)

I'm a little apprehensive.

I am wondering if this is really, really, really necessary?

Yes!


So, here I am - that's me under Sydney Harbour Bridge.






Okay, that's not being real is it?


Up a little closer...


Well that's not going to keep me accountable..

A little more honesty I hear you say... Ok - brace yourselves..

Yep, I have got a bit of work ahead of me - I just love the lobsided glasses:).

A regular feature on my face apparently!!!

I need to go for a walk now - while I am all inspired and guilt ridden and before I press delete.

Will post on Sydney in the next few days.

Cheers